hockey blog april08

April 30, 2008

I'm not sure but I think very few people would have picked Detroit, Pittsburgh and Dallas to hold 3-0 leads in their series at this point in the week.

And frankly, it's selfish hockey.

Because it's not even MAY yet and we're practically on the cusp of the conference finals.

Has anyone given a thought to what this might mean to beer sales?

Has anyone given a thought to what this might mean to Ron and Don?

Or me for that matter? What will I watch on TV??

Really. It's just selfish.

Thank goodness for the Habs and Bruins.

- - -

Do you watch the TV series House? We do, and it returned to TV with a new episode this week.

Some guy had a rare and befuddling disease and grumpy doctor House mumbled and chastised people for an hour and then a heroic and life-saving diagnosis emerged at the last second.

Honestly, it was a stunning turn of events. You could have knocked me over with a feather.

You'd think that Hollywood A-list writers making north of $500K would have come up with an original plot twist while staring into the lattes on the picket line last winter.

- - -

Too tired to read or type last night on the train, I turned on the iPod and fumbled around till I came across the soundtrack for Almost Famous.

I'd forgotten what a great collection of music it is and for that matter, what a great film it is.

My older son (athlete cum guitar/sax player) is of an age where I think he'd like the movie (and not be shocked by some of the content) -- the story of a very young journalist trying to get the goods on an emerging band for a story for -- yes, The Rolling Stone. It's all based somewhat on the real-life experience of a young Cameron Crowe, before he started making movies.

If you have never watched this movie, run -- don't walk -- to Blockbuster and rent it. It's a funny, touching, cruel, uplifting, often rose-coloured view of the generally cut-throat big-league music business and a time when guys like me lived in small rooms in our parents houses listening to LP records through headphones at ear-splitting volumes and wondering if life everywhere was as boring as it was in Windsor Junction, NS. We also wondered if there was a way to turn air guitar into a career. Sadly for us, but perhaps good for the Canadian economy, we were forced to get real jobs.

The movie is chock full of great scenes -- my favourite being a scene on the band's bus rolling to their next gig and the Elton John song, Tiny Dancer, is playing in the background. The song is about a groupie and groupies play a large part in the movie, their lot glamourized by Kate Hudson in her Oscar-nominated role as Penny Lane. One person starts softly singing, then another and in short order the entire bus is singing as the song reaches it's famous chorus, "Hold me closer tiny dancer, count the headlights on the highway . . . " Maybe you have to see it, but it's a very cool scene.

Sometimes, the soundtrack can lift a movie from being very good to great, and that's what this soundtrack does.

Simon and Garfunkel, The Who, Yes, The Allman Brothers, Lynard Skynard, Led Zeppelin, David Bowie, The Beach Boys, Cat Stevens and others who, coincidentally performed large parts of the soundtrack of my youth.

Two of my favourite all-time songs are included -- Rod Stewart's Every Picture Tells a Story, which if you've never paid attention to the lyrics you really should. It's quite a tale.

And the other, Todd Rundgren's It Wouldn't Have Made Any Difference. My wife will tell you that I am a big Todd Rundgren fan, although I suspect many of you have no clue who he is, but you know his work. He had a big hit in the 1970s -- Hello It's Me. You know it -- it goes like this . . .

Anyway, I'm a fan.

- - -

After yesterday's session of blog 101, I thought I'd post a link to this story from the Globe and Mail, which explores the question of how much of what happens in a person's house -- and more specifically, with their kids -- is fair game for parent bloggers.

Good question.

I rarely change anything after the fact but there have been times when I wondered if it was a little close to the bone.

I do self edit before I write -- my own stupidity is an endless source of amusement. The shortcomings of others in my family, not so much.

But one thing we have found is that the blog is a broad diary of life in the Greenbriar Drive Amateur Athletic and Social Club -- where we were a year ago, who we played in the semi-finals, etc. The gory details tend to be left out, but we remember them once the blog jogs our collective memory.

Anyway, the Globe piece is interesting.

April 29, 2008

Is it just me, or is some of the aura coming off Carey Price? I think as much as the Habs hoped he would be Patrick Roy circa 1986, it's just not happening and Montreal is going to have to win some games, as opposed to hoping he steals them. The Flyers were the better team again last night.

Oh, and let's get Sean Avery and Steve Downy on the same team.

- - -

Chris made his school's basketball team, which was the big sporting event news in our house Monday. And I'll give the big guy this -- he's all about context and perspective. He was very nonchalent about the whole thing and when I suggested maybe we hit the driveway to shoot some hoops early in the evening, he said, no, it was too cold. Maybe later.

NCAA scholarship offers can be sent to the usual contact point.

- - -

The quest for suits continues. Lots of good feedback, more welcome. Send your recommendations here.

- - -

Blog readers are a curious bunch, which is why they read blogs I guess. I've had several questions lately about traffic, etc., so some generic answers.

The end of minor hockey season typically brings a drop in traffic and this year is no different. Except that the decline was from a base that grew remarkably (for me) over the winter.

When I first started in late 2005, in a good month the blog would get 250 visits. This month will top out around 5,000 visits -- still peanuts in the real world. During minor hockey season it will top 7,000 a month.

This April there are about 30 per cent more of you than last April, and that's enough momentum to keep things rolling through the summer. But it's never been about traffic. It's been about having some fun.

You all tend to show up on Monday in great hordes, then disappear for a day or two, and then check in again on Friday. You are the digital thundering herd, foraging for stuff in corners of the Internet.

Some of you are loyal to the point of needing t-shirts and support groups. The logs show folks reading from bookmarked pages in Nebraska, South Carolina, South Korea, Arizona, Florida, England and more -- which I assume are the result of people traveling for business or vacation.

About 88 per cent of you are from Canada, most of that in southern Ontario. The rest are mostly Americans who stumbled across the site from a search engine and then stayed for the food and the cheap shots at the Leafs.

Occasionally, I hit a nerve around here. The recent rep hockey discussion -- how to cut, managing kids' feelings, etc. -- generated more commentary from people than almost anything in recent months. And I appreciate the feedback, positive and negative, on just about anything.

I get ribbed about the (generally) relentlessly positive tone of the content here (except for the Leafs and GO Transit.) Simply explained, it's because kids come here too. There are lots of places for cynicism and blue humour and ranting. This (with the exception of the odd rant not pointed at kids) isn't and never will be one of them.

This place started in 2004 purely as a site to host a schedule for a house league minor peewee team. Then a division. Then more teams and on and on. The blog was an add on about two years later. I had lots to say before that, but generally I just talked to myself in the car.

There are way better programs out there for blogs than the way I do it, but this sort of fits. If there's an expert out there who could integrate one of those programs into my site (I'm quite attached to teamoakville) I'd consider it and then I'd have an RSS feed and other cool toys. For now, I'm low tech.

And one dad on Saturday night suggested he might like to start a blog -- I said that's a great idea.

Google names like typepad and blogspot and you'll find free tools to get started. Send me a link when you do. I'd love to read it.

Until next hockey season you can expect to read about lacrosse, some high school rugby, golf, summer hockey, life, the Leafs, long weekends and yes Gil, the wonders of a Nova Scotia and Cape Breton vacation, among other things.

Feel free to stay in touch. The emails are great fun.

April 28, 2008

So, being the really useful and handy guy that I am I spent my Sunday doing all sorts of creative and constructive things around the house - like, um, returning empty wine bottles and taking down the Christmas lights.

Man, if I don't sound like an ad for white trash, I don't know what does.

Pad had a final, final exhibition hockey game in Burlington last night. I switched from shorts and a t-shirt to jeans and a long-sleeve pullover, because I didn't want to cause rioting over my legs, and I didn't want to freeze.

There was a black fleece jacket in the back of my car and I figured that would be all the protection I'd need in Burlington's Appleby Arena.

And, I would have been right. Except the fleece belonged to Laura, not me and guess what? She's several dozen sizes smaller than me.

So I manned up and stood in the rink and froze. And the Rangers lost.

Just FYI, here's a free tip when booking or betting on exhibition hockey games -- when two teams play, and one team signed all their cards 10 days ago and shows up with only 11 or 12 skaters, and the other team has 16 kids all still in the hunt for a AAA spot, bet on the kids who are playing for something.

The Rangers were thinking about golf, or lacrosse, or soccer, or rugby, or girls, or something. But not hockey.

- - -

The Pens lead the Rangers 2-0 in their NHL series playing smart, evolving hockey that is proving them far more versatile than the one-dimensional scoring machine some would have us believe.

But the best part of the series so far was seeing (former Leaf) Hal Gill put a beat down on (possible future Leaf) Sean Avery.

- - -

Speaking of me getting a life, lacrosse season is lurching into gear now -- practice tonight, tomorrow night, etc etc and four, count 'em, four field lacrosse games this coming weekend.

If it's sunny, there's nothing more glorious than sitting in the sun watching field lacrosse. (Eds note: There's a pretty clear statement on the state of my life when I think there's nothing more glorious than sitting on the edge of a field watching smelly teens hit each other with sticks and chase a small rubber ball. Pathetic.)

If it's raining, I'll probably be thinking that a bus tour through Baghdad or a summer place on Alcatraz would offer better recreational opportunities.

- - -

I need viewer feedback. I'm going to buy a couple new suits. The question I need feedback on is, where.

I already know about the obvious places. And to be clear, I'm not looking for cheap, I'm looking for quality and value. Suggestions are welcome here. Seriously.

And remember, I'm 6-3. So, don't bother directing me to Cousin Jim's House of the Smart-Dressed Diminutive Man. Similarly, I'm shying away from Big Ed's Bulk Suits, Bowling Accessories and Gun Sales.

Otherwise, I'm open to suggestions.

There have to be options I'm not aware of where they don't turn your pockets inside out first and then sell you a suit.

April 27, 2008

Congratulations to the Oakville Blades, who beat Newmarket 6-3 last night to win the Central Canadian tier-2 junior A hockey championship.

The Blades will play in the Centennial Cup next weekend in Cornwall.

Game story here, game summary here.

Well done, guys.

- - -

Chris was between the pipes Saturday as the house league peewee Oakville Roughnecks edged the Bandits 8-7 to even their season record at 1-1. It was a terrific back-and-forth game.

- - -

A final word about rep hockey tryouts, what with all the exploration of the hurt and failed expectations last week, let's go to a tale of success.

A friend and coaching colleague has a younger son who finally cracked a Ranger lineup this spring. To say he was elated doesn't do justice to his excitement. As I have said before, the first year of rep hockey is an incredible amount of fun and excitement for the kids.

Anyway, on the way home from the final tryout, with the ink barely dry on his newly-signed player card, this new Ranger turned to his dad in the car and said, "I couldn't have done it without you."

And they exchanged high fives. (I bet they went to Dairy Queen too!)

His dad was good enough to share the story, and make the point that he made with his son -- you did it, not me. You skated, you shot, you passed, you did it all.

And true enough.

But I think the young Ranger, in his excitement, was wise beyond his years.

Few kids succeed in minor sports without an incredible amount of support at home. Logistical, monetary, emotional, and otherwise. Sometimes sacrifices are made that affect the whole family for the sake of one child's opportunity. Make no mistake, the NHL is littered with brothers whose siblings paid a price to help them live their dreams.

So, hats off to a young guy smart enough to recognize that his mom and dad are part of the equation.

And hats off to all the parents and families who work hard to help make all those dreams come true.

All those guys on the Oakville Blades who skated around the rink last night with the Dudley Hewitt Cup held high? They

started somewhere -- like house league years and years ago. A lot of parents and brothers and sisters were there every step of the way. If you've every had your skates sharpened at Corbetts in Oakville, there's a good chance it was a member of the Oakville Blades who did the job.

Who knows what Cornwall will bring?

Go Blades Go!

April 26, 2008

We all went to the Buzz game last night to watch the home team blow a two-goal third-period lead and eventually lose 12-10 to Mimico in overtime. It must have been a dispiriting loss for the Buzz in their home opener as they controlled great gobs of the play but succumbed to a lot of dumb retaliation penalties and undisciplined play.

To me they looked like clearly the better team and the result should never have even been close. But it's tough to score from the penalty box, and Mimico made them pay the bill.

Just an observation as a parent and fan: I think if the Buzz want to draw more fans -- and make no mistake the games are entertaining and the players are very skilled -- they need to find a way to finish the evening in a lot less than two and half hours. Failing that, start earlier. Getting home on a Friday night at 11p is tough on people with small kids and tough on people who have had a long week.

I mention it only because what was already a modest turnout got considerably smaller after the second period, and it was a close game and the home opener. So, as usual., I'm just sayin' . . .

Otherwise though it was a very social evening out, with us and many of the rest of Oakville's lacrosse nerds enjoying the game and craning for a view of Jim Veltman.

Yes, yes.

We need to get real lives.

- - -

Back to hockey -- the Oakville Blades will play today for the Ontario tier-two junior A hockey championship and a ticket to the national tournament (in beautiful Cornwall, ON.) The Blades will play Newmarket for the Dudley Hewitt Cup. Good luck to Oakville. You can read a scene-setter for today's game here.

Oakville unfortunately lost it's starting goalie due to an NCAA eligibility ruling, which has to sting. Read about that one here.

- - -

As usual on Saturday, I'm at the pool with Chris. We sprint from here in 15 minutes for Glen Abbey and lacrosse, and then a birthday party. And then Pad coaches. And then he refs.

I love lacrosse season.

April 25, 2008

Lest anyone think that I was making too big a thing out of my comments yesterday on rep hockey tryouts, I offer the following.

I have some code written into this site that tells me where the traffic comes from, how often, etc etc. It also tells me when someone comes here from a search engine, and what word string they used to get here.

Several times in the last two days, several different people ended up here after searching with some version of the following word string:

"How to help your child if they get cut from rep hockey."

Maybe I should write a book, but I don't think I'd know where to start.

And if anyone DID ask me, my advice would start with suggesting you give him/her a hug. They help at any age.

But it's sobering to think how many parents are coping with unhappy kids at this time of year.

Sometimes I hate it when I'm right.

April 25, 2008

Is it just me, or did April kind whiz past with crazy speed? And May is going to do the same thing -- the first two weekends of May are pretty much booked up with work stuff. Whatever happened to down time?

- - -

Two really entertaining games kicked off the NHL playoff second round last night. The Habs fought out of a 2-0 hole and scored the tying goal with 28 seconds left to force Philly to OT, where Montreal promptly won it in the first minute.

In Detroit, the Red Wings jumped to a big lead and then went to Starbucks or something, letting Colorado off the mat and barely holding on for a 4-3 win.

The other series start tonight.

- - -

But those games will be played without me watching, because I'll be at the home opener for the 2008 Oakville Buzz (that's junior lacrosse to the uninitiated out there.)

The Buzz -- national champions in 2006 -- opened the season last weekend with a 6-3 win over Mississauga and host Mimico this evening.

Pad is volunteering with the team at home games this year (not sure doing what, exactly) so me and Chris are going to head over and watch what is always a pretty exciting evening of young men crashing into one another and beating each other with sticks.

Tonight's game will also honour GTA lacrosse legend -- and he really is -- Jim Veltman, who is retiring after a stellar career that includes five NLL championships and three Mann Cups. You can read more on him here.

Game time tonight is 8p at Glen Abbey.

- - -

Field lacrosse games are still actually a week away, so this is likely the last weekend where the house will have a relative veneer of normalcy. Buzz game tonight, then Chris has swimming and a house league game tomorrow. Pad has his novice charges to coach tomorrow and then referees two or three house league games in the afternoon.

Sunday night he has another exhibition hockey game in Burlington, after which the skates go in the closet until the end of August.

- - -

I meant to mention this earlier, but my short-term memory is so bad that if I was standing in front of a pile of wood at the fireplace with a flaming match in my hand I'd forget why I was there or what I intended to do next.

Anyway, when Chris and I boarded the plane in Halifax last weekend we got all settled in and Chris started quietly looking out the window, which means he's thinking.

Chris loves to visit Nova Scotia -- we all do, of course, but leaving at the end of the summer is always toughest for him (and his mother) and he talks about his cousins and aunts and uncles and grandparents all the time. Short visits like last weekend are somewhat easier.

So, after a long silence, he turns to me.

"Dad, did you ever notice that everyone else except us lives here?"

I knew who he meant by "everyone else" and yes, I notice it too.

We've lived in Oakville for nine years and have wonderful friends and a great neighbourhood. And whenever any of us talks about making plans to go "home," everyone knows where home is.

Especially Chris.

April 24, 2008

I'm sure that at some point soon I will return to my witty and sarcastic self, but my mind is preoccupied these days on other matters, so bear with me while I limp along with blogger's cramp. In the meantime, I'll take a run at the NHL second-round playoff matchups. Anything worse than getting three out of four of these right is a failing grade:

- - -

Flyers vs. Habs: As much as I think Montreal just limped past Boston, I think they have too much depth and good coaching for the Flyers, who tend to be hot and cold. Of course, if Philly gets hot at the same time Carey Price has a rookie swoon like he did in the Boston series (to let the Bruins off the ropes), then I lose. But I'll take the Habs in six.

Rangers vs. Pens: This will be a good one and I'm going to call for an upset here, Rangers in seven. The Rangers have been, in my mind, the most underrated team in the NHL for two years. Strong down the middle with Jagr on the right and good consistent defence and goaltending. Make no mistake, the Penguins are the future of the NHL writ large. But the Rangers look like the Energizer Bunny to me. And I think they'll keep on going.

Detroit vs. Colorado: Call me crazy, but I think for all the hype about the long playoff rivalry blah blah blah that the Avs are already one series late for the golf course. Yes, Theodore is playing great (this week.) And Joe Sakic is fab but he's missed a lot of hockey this year. Ryan Smyth is one of the best guys in the league in front of the net. Etc. But the Red Wings were 20 points clear of them during the season, and I don't really see an answer in Colorado for Datsyuk and Zetterberg, not to mention Lidstrom. I think the Avs have the edge in goal right now, but the Wings win in six.

Sharks vs Stars: Is the Stars' upset of the Ducks for real? I don't think so, but if they can knock off San Jose then I guess we'll have to take them seriously. Personally, I don't see it happening. Sharks in seven.

- - -

Well, he did it. Pad got his head buzzed yesterday and funny thing, underneath all that hair is a pretty good looking guy. The Under Armor Hockey ball cap is still more or less permanently grafted onto his scalp, so actual sightings of his crew-cut self will remain fleeting an rare. But he did it.

- - -

As predicted, yesterday was a panic. Post-school rugby practice (Pad) followed by novice lacross house league practice (Pad coaches) followed by Chri's house league practice following by a minor midget AA Ranger exhibition game in Stoney Creek (5-0 win.) Today Pad has three high school rugby games and then a 90 minute lacrosse practice.

- - -

LOSING TORONTO SPORTS TEAM UPDATE #1: Brian Burke rains on the parade planning in Toronto, pointing out that he already has a job, ain't interested in coming to Toronto and . . . see ya' later. So, on to Plan B. Or C. Or D. If they even have a plan. Read more here.

LOSING TORONTO SPORTS TEAM UPDATE #2: Raptors are down 2-0 in their first-round NBA playoff series, which resumes tonight in Toronto. Does Chris Bosh golf? Read more here.

LOSTING TORONTO SPORTS TEAM UPDATE #3: For a season that started with so much promise, the Blue Jays seem to be letting it all slip away pretty fast. It's not even the end of April and they're 4.5 games out of first. Not good. My dad's a smart guy. My dad says John Gibbons should have been fired in October. Discuss among yourselves. More here.

- - -

I mentioned before Oakville rep hockey tryouts started that these things can be tricky. For all the kids who have a good experience, move up -- or even more exciting -- get their first chance to play rep, the process (and they problem is the process) can become a caldron of ill will, festering resentments, delusional self-interest, and worse.

This year's tryouts scored on all those counts. (Just FYI, My kid landed right where I expected him to land, so I've no personal axe to grind here. But I get mail. I get lots and lots of mail.)

So, on the one hand, for a kid there is absolutely nothing cooler than the first year you play rep. It will stay with you forever. It's new, it's fun, it's challenging, it's exciting. It's a glimpse of a much bigger world out there. We can be as cynical as we want about everything that's wrong with minor hockey, but show me a kid pulling on his Oakville Rangers jersey for the first time, and I'll show you the picture of pure joy.

Congratulations and good luck to all those players, and the others who moved up in the system. Well done.

But there are not-so-happy stories too. Too many of them, actually. Like if a kid cut from an Oakville AE team is immediately signed to or offered a AA card in other centres. Or a kid makes AE in Oakville, and has multiple AA opportunities elsewhere, and leaves Oakville.

To me, that makes me scratch my chin and say, "hmmmmm."

I'm not saying I have a prescription off the top of my head. But a situation like the one I just described is, at the very least, a flashing yellow light.

April 23, 2008

Another busy day in the concrete jungle, so a quick recap of my dismal Round One NHL playoff predictions to entertain you. My record in the first round was 5-3, which I consider a failing grade. 6-2 would be a pass, 7-1 an A, 8-0 an A+.

-- Montreal over Boston four games to three. I got this one right, but Montreal barely got through. Unless you count arrests, police cars burned, stores looted, and cops assaulted. If you count all that stuff, it was a runaway win for the Habs.

-- Pittsburgh over Ottawa in four. Heh, Heh. The Pens made me look like Kreskin.

-- Rangers over Devils. Another one I got right, boldly predicting that the rest of the Devils aren't as good as their goalie.

-- Flyers over Caps. The only one I got wrong in the East. I really thought Alexander the Great could carry the Caps one round, and that the Flyers are . . . not that good.

-- Red Wings over Nashville. I got this one right, but just barely. The Wings will have to find their game in the second round.

-- Colorado over Minnesota. Doh. I picked the Wild. Maybe I should run into the wild.

-- Stars over the Ducks. Quack. I picked the Ducks, who are now done like dinner. I'm getting hungry.

-- Sharks over the Flames. I got this one right. Sorry to see the Flames go, though.

Round two predictions tomorrow.

- - -

Pad and his APHS teammates debuted in rugby with middling results yesterday, going 1-1-1 in a mini tournament. Today has a rugby practice, a house league lacrosse practice for the team Pad coaches, and then an exhibition hockey game; Chris has lacrosse practice too.

Not really sure how we're going to do all that stuff.

- - -

Is Brian Burke going to be the next GM of the Leafs? I can't begin to tell you how completely indifferent Mr. Burke is to my opinions -- he never returns my calls and never calls me to ask for advice.

But the conventional thinking in Toronto -- where it seems sports writers often drink their own and each other's bath water (that image will put you off your morning muffin) is that Burke is the guy.

Burke -- the biggest curmudgeon this side of John Brophy -- would certainly make things interesting here. Plus, he builds winning teams.

Read more here.

April 22, 2008

Chris and I arrived back from Halifax on Sunday evening after a whirlwind visit built around marking my mother's 80th birthday. Our only complaint about the trip was that it was too short, but everything else was great as several generations of the family converged Saturday afternoon to laugh and tell stories and do all the things you do at these things.

Chris spent a lot of time just hanging out with his grandparents and a favourite uncle and I listened to my sisters exchange stories. I was the only one who was well behaved. And I won't even get into the whole "mom liked me best" thing, because, well, it's best not to make them feel bad. They're older than me, you know?

- - -

Oh, special thanks to all of you who took the time to point out that the blog has been untended for a couple of days. Honestly people, buy a newspaper. Use Google. Talk to your spouses. I'm flattered and everything, but the threats of physical violence seemed a bit over the top.

- - -

The reason for the near absence of blogging is the frantic pace of life these days. Laura and I are both pretty much run off our feet at work and the other stuff -- ferrying the boys to lacrosse, rugby, hockey, whatever -- has been particularly taxing lately. But both lacrosse and hockey tryouts are over -- that's the good news. The bad news is that on top of the seasonal activities, Pad's minor midget hockey team may have two exhibition games this week, in between lacrosse and high school rugby. And they call this the off season.

- - -

We have a guy who cuts our grass every couple of weeks (I don't even have a lawn mower. How's that for reducing my carbon footprint?) and he made his first visit yesterday. He took Christmas lights off the shrubbery along the front walk because obviously, I haven't gotten to it yet.

I was thinking it would be easier just to leave everything up until December. Oh well.

- - -

Speaking of rugby, Pad will get to play in his first ever game today, for Abbey Park High School. They're in a one-day tournament in Stoney Creek. I don't hold out high expectations for the APHS rugby squad -- some other high schools seems to take their rugby much more seriously than Abbey Park. But they do have some good athletes, so you never know I guess.

But the kicker here is when he came home from lacrosse practice last night (at 11:20 pm. Yes, it was that late) he announced he was going to buzz-cut his hair, because everyone else on the team was going to. (Eds note: Pad has a lot of hair, so this would be a significant development.)

Um, just a thought -- wouldn't it be easier to get team jackets if you want all the girls to know you're a rugby player? He explained that the point was to give the other team fewer things to grab onto, and hair was a prime target in scrums.

Once upon a time -- I was seven or eight -- I had a buzz cut. It wasn't a good look for, if it's possible for me to even have a good look.

Unfortunately as he will learn today, there are other things not-so-easily removed that the other guys will grab in the scrum.

Have fun!

- - -

So, Montreal smokes Boston 5-0 last night to win their FIRST ROUND series in seven games. And then a significant portion of the populous of the downtown area decide the best way to mark a FIRST ROUND victory is to riot.

Un-friggin'-believeable.,

Here in Toronto we take a lot of abuse for a lot of things, all for good reason.

Like when the mayor calls out the army to help clear the streets after a series of snow storms (we'll never live that down.)

And when the Leafs actually make the playoffs (which hasn't happened for three straight years, if you're counting) the faithful drive around in their suped-up Civcs and Camaros and honk their horns and lean out the car windows screaming like Bobby Baun just came back with a broken leg and won a big game in OT. They act pretty stupid.

They overreact, but they don't loot stores and torch emergency vehicles, which several dozen morons in Montreal did last night.

Maybe they forgot that it's THE FIRST ROUND.

Maybe they forgot that they beat the Bruins, who barely made it into the playoffs.

Anyway, it really took the luster off the night - the atmosphere at the Bell Centre seemed electric -- an important game in a city that really cares about hockey.

And then a riot. What a bunch of clowns.

- - -

Oh. Happy Earth Day.

My favourite Earth Day moment came 18 years ago in Ottawa. I was playing golf with friends and one of them -- a particularly bad golfer -- was in some bullrushes. He was flailing and hacking away at the ball like some sort of clear-cutting machine.

Final the ball moved out of the bog and back to the fairway, at which point he raised his hands over his head in triumph and yelled, "Happy Earth Day!"

Have a hacking good day.

April 18, 2008

It's just after 6p and I'm sitting the departure lounge at Pearson, completely baked after a trying day at work and a not-great night's sleep.

But two words will change all that. Two words that strike fear and loathing in everyone in our path. Two words that have been a primal scream since professional team sports, fishing, and beer were invented.

Boys' weekend.

Because sitting with me here at Gate 122 is my main man Chris and we're jetting off to Halifax to spend a weekend with family. Nana brownies for breakfast. Nana brownies for lunch. Nana brownies.

The Oakville Rangers will have to pick the AAA and AA minor midget teams without me watching tonight. Somehow I suspect they'll cope.

And Oakville Minor Lacrosse will have to start it's season for house leaguers without me swinging a door, or Chris running the floor.

They'll cope too.

And the NHL playoffs, and the lineup for red meat at Brunos and cold beer at The Beer Store . . . those things will have to soldier on without me.

Because it's Friday night.

Boys' weekend. Adventures to live, stories to write, lies to tell.

Hope your weekend is fun, too.

Have a good one!

April 17, 2008

Honestly, I'd have said something sooner but I was giggling so much that my hands were shaking, making it impossible to type.

I'm not certain I've ever mentioned it before, but I don't care for the Sens.

The Penguins completed the sweep of Ottawa last night, putting the finishing touches on as complete a humiliation as there has been in the NHL in some time (with the exception of the Leafs missing the playoffs for three straight seasons for the first time in eight decades, perhaps.)

The difference between the Leafs and the Sens, of course, is like the difference between a new Ferrari and an old mini van. You might suspect the Ferrari would generally win the race.

But somewhere in the Sens locker room there's a serious, serious problem. If that much talent can't at least win a couple round in the playoffs, maybe you should sell off the parts and start over.

Meanwhile, the Pens -- who for all the talk of their youth etc, are truly only slightly younger than the Sens -- look for all the world like a budding dynasty, the emerging power in the East.

Cast your mind back to the spring of 1981. Montreal won its division with 103 points and in the first round played Edmonton, who were six games under .500 that year with three more points than the Leafs.

The Oilers swept Montreal in the best of five series and like the cliché says, the rest is history. By the time the next decade arrived, Edmonton had won five Stanley Cups.

And perhaps a cautionary footnote on the Sens: sometimes a minor tinkering can make all the difference. Starting around 1991, the Detroit Red Wing put together some fabulous hockey teams, most notably the 1995-96 team that lost only 13 games, accumulated 131 point and . . . lost in the conference finals to eventual champs Colorado.

But they also had three Cup teams after that. So, I'm just sayin'. Maybe Scotty Bowman should move to Ottawa.

- - -

As part of his high school geography program, Pad yesterday took part in something called, "Flight Over Halton."

When initially briefed on this optional academic activity, my reaction was: "Hmmmm."

The idea being that, for a fee ($45 I think) students climb in a small plane in groups of three and are flown over Halton, ostensibly to, I'm sure, examine the unique geographical features of our corner of southern Ontario in a safe, positive learning environment, 3,000 feet in the air.

So, first we checked it out to make sure the service was provided by a reputable service and not Cousin Eddie's RV Sales and Aerial Tours. All good.

Then we asked him if he wanted to do it. He did (but he did repeatedly volunteer that if we weren't comfortable with him doing it, it would be OK if he didn't go. Being a believer in the rule that you have to let the dogs run sometimes, I had no big objection.)

So he went.

I picked him up at 7:15p at Kinoak last night on my way home from work -- he had his first practice with his novice house league lacrosse team.

He wasn't in the car 10 seconds: "Dad, the flight over Halton was sooooo cool. We pulled zero-Gs twice!!"

Really!! Cool!! Zero Gs!! There's something you don't usually see in the Ministry of Education Grade 9 core curriculum.

Yes, there's an educational experience for you -- appreciating the grandeur of the Niagara Escarpment while freefalling in a four-seater airplane to achieve weightlessness.

I really went to high school in the wrong decade, no doubt about it.

"My necklace was floating in front of my face and a pen was floating right in front of us!!"

Um, cool.

And the geography? "I got a great picture of our house!"

I see.

And how did the pilot achieve the whole zero-gravity thing?

"Oh, he stalled the engine or something and the plane just sort of . . . ."

Fell?

"Yeah."

And how was that?

"Really loud. Everyone was screaming. It was so cool."

Me: "HE TURNED THE ENGINE OFF???"

"Hard to say, dad. It got really quiet for a second, but once everyone started screaming it was just hard to hear. It might have been running. I just couldn't hear it."

Did you get sick?

"Na, but we weren't allowed to eat before the flight. But I didn't feel great afterward for a while."

And thus ended the debriefing on Flight Over Halton.

Standing in the kitchen last night with Laura I said I learned two important things.

One, that only Grade 9 students do this, so Pad is done.

And Two, this is another thing we can cross off the list of things Chris can ever do.

- - -

Back to the rink for Evening Three of minor midget rep tryouts. Four straight nights of two-hour lacrosse sessions last week followed by the same hockey tryout sked is taking a toll on the kids, mine included. Lots of aches and pains and creaky joints, and that's just me opening the Diet Pepsi.

- - -

Hats off to all the coaches and kids on the atom AA Oakville Hornets, OWHA Provincial Gold Medal Champions.

What a year these girls had -- I've mentioned some of their exploits here a few times but just to recap:

OWHA PROVINCIALS 2008 Atom AA Gold Medal Champions
- Lower Lakes League 2008 Atom AA Gold Medal Champions
- International Women’s Silver Stick Atom AA Gold Medal Champions
- London Devilettes 18th Annual Tournament Atom AA Gold Medal Champions
- Waterloo Ravens Fall Challenge Cup Atom AA Gold Medal Champions
- Bell Canada Cup – Silver Medal
- Willowdale RedWings - Silver Medal

A special shout out to Nicky Cece, the keeper of the corded cottage for the Hornets and member of the fabulous skating Cece clan.

Congratulations to all of you -- the first Hornets team to cop an Ontario championship since 2003. Well done!

April 16, 2008

Got back from Montreal in time to get to the rink for the minor midget AA/AAA tryouts last night. some 60-plus kids, including 13 goalies. I honestly have no clue how you make sense of all that. Round two tonight.

- - -

It is worth stating that Montreal has the most beautiful and stylish women on the planet, except for Oakville, and Greenbriar Drive particularly. Spring in Montreal is pretty grand.

Of course, I spent the day in meeting rooms and taxis. But still. There were windows, you know?

- - -

EDS NOTE: Caution! The following post contains some sweeping generalizations.

Regular readers will be aware of my habit of emptying all the coin in pockets into a plastic bowl at the end of the day, which serves several useful purposes, including but not limited to, driving Laura insane, allowing me to save for retirement $3.26 at a time, ensuring a steady supply of loonies and toonies for hot lunch day at the school, etc etc.

I have received notes from women readers pointing out that (surprise) I'm not the only guy on the planet doing this. And in fact, it seems hardwired to the male core. Details vary, but in some form or another, we're dumping our loose change at the end of the day. All women are annoyed by it too, until they need $3 for a kid's hot lunch day and the school bus is outside.

I point this out because careful observation of women's shopping habits brings further definition to this matter.

If you are in line at a checkout behind a woman, and she buys stuff totaling $6.57, you'd better bring a book because you are going to be there awhile.

Most (not all, but most) women will pull out a $5 bill and then -- hold on -- go for the change pocket on their wallet, or worse, the separate and colourful change purse. Often it's yellow, or has Garfield the Cat on it, or perhaps flowers.

And then they start a manic search for a loonie and some other precise combination of coin totaling 57 cents. It won't matter how many people are in line. And God help you if there's a coupon involved. Or a hunt for a shopper's loyalty card. If you are waiting with a roll of bandage and a flaming spear sticking out of your chest, she will be plunking nickels and pennies on the counter until . . . the . . . exact ... precise . . . total . . . is . . . presented.

Of course, women carry purses and duffle bags to accommodate the hauling of several pounds of coin with them. Most men don't so that's why we empty our pockets. If I'm carrying a bag, I'd better be entering a gym or a rink.

And this phenomenon can also be observed when groups of women go out to dinner.

A dinner bill for $131, divided among four women will, almost without exception, require a team of accountants from PriceWaterhouse to audit and determine who had the chicken with the Caesar salad, who had the wine spritzer vs. the French merlot, with the requisite accounting and totaling. Calculation of tip and proportioning thereof is usually referred to the Commons Finance Committee.

Men, almost without exception in my experience, with throw four credit cards on the table and cut the bill equally without even looking at it or caring who had the four Corona (me) vs. the two Coors Light.

It's probably why most men would die penniless if not for their more responsible better halves.

As you can tell, I spent some time standing in a line today. It wasn't pretty.

- - -

Pittsburgh can put Ottawa out of its misery tonight. I'm expecting a death-bed shudder from the Sens and they'll squeak out a win.

April 15, 2008

I'm off to Montreal for the day so, light blogging, eh?

If everyone in Canada flew Porter Airlines just once, Air Canada would be out of business in 20 minutes. Not sure whether they make any money, but no one around you moos or otherwise treats you like cattle.

After I get home I'm off to the rink for the first round of MOHA's minor midget rep hockey tryouts.

- - -

Pittsburgh 4 Ottawa 1. Pens lead the series 3-0.

I don't care for the Senators and they are making my spring a happy one. If there was ever a bigger rollover in the playoffs, I'm hard pressed to think of it.

April 14, 2008

Rep hockey tryouts start today in Oakville. It is a week where some house league grinders are going to achieve their dreams, and some long-time rep players are going to have their hearts broken. And vice versa. I'm not really sure where I'm going with this today, so bear with me.

It is a cruel process where men with clipboards get painted into corners and have to make choices. Some choices are easy. Some are very, very difficult. Sometimes coaches are accused of all manner of malfeasance, poor judgment, and worse.

Others are hailed as visionaries who have the Midas touch and can do no wrong. To make such a team is to be touched by the hand of . . . well, if not God, at least Scotty or Punch.

At the centre of the process in most age groups is The Walk of Shame. Some out there no doubt will tsk-tsk at me for using such a term, but it is what it is called by every coach, every parent, and every player who has even a remote familiarity with how we do these things in Oakville.

At the appointed time in the tryout schedule, cuts are made. Kids line up outside a dressing room and enter, one at a time. The coaches tell him/her to come back tomorrow, or to work hard in house league and we'll see you next year. (For rep players, it might mean being told you're moving from AAA to AA., or AA to A. Or you're moving up a level.)

And one by one, the kids have to exit that room and walk by their friends in the line and try to either not grin like a fool and to stifle their excitement, or more challenging, to conceal their disappointment.

For the younger ages, a parent -- usually but not always a dad -- accompanies the player into the room. And depending on the news, sometimes a decision is challenged and it's never comfortable. I have had enough rep coaches tell me stories that I know this to be true. Friendships have been shattered in those decisions and conversations.

As they get older, the kids face the music alone. They're older and more mature, but they bruise just as easily. I've seen it up close more than once, including last week when my kid was cut from the Oakville Hawks midget 1 team (this would be akin to AAA in hockey). He made the 2 team (very few 1993 players made the senior team) and is now excited and looking forward to the season.

But no one likes to be cut.

One thing I liked about the midget lacrosse process was that the players were treated like men. The coach didn't do a Walk of Shame. Instead, he walked into the dressing room after the third tryout, and told the boys he had to make choices and those who didn't make the team shouldn't get upset, or words to that effect. And then he posted a list on the wall and walked out. And that was that.

During high school hockey tryouts for the junior varsity team, players received emails. I thought this approach was way better than the dreaded walk.

Anyway, I have a lot of time for the kids who are hauling their gear to the rinks this weekend, either hoping to trade their house league jerseys for Ranger blue, or who are already rep players pushing to make a new level. Still others are Oakville boys returning to the fold after a stint in the GTHL.

It takes more guts than you think to expose yourself to the judgment of others and the possibility of The Cut.

And it's very stressful on the other side of the clipboard too. One friend who did it for a year said he'd never do it again as he had no interest in seeing the hurt in the kids' eyes. That's not why he got involved in minor hockey.

So, if you're taking your kids to the tryouts this week, good luck. Tell them to work hard, stay loose and have fun. And be ready to be there when they need you.

To the coaches -- here's hoping you are blessed this week with the clarity to see and make good decisions, and the wisdom to manage the cuts wisely.

It's stressful. Good luck to everyone.

- - -

Still with hockey, Chris and the Flyers lost their final game to their house league rivals, the Hound Dogs, on Saturday night and the 'Dogs went on to the semis on Sunday, where they won before losing in the final while I was watching the Masters. Coach James Bork did a great job with this team and they had a successful season. The smiles tell the story. Congratulations on a great showing:

- - -

Part of my day was spent at house league lacrosse evaluations yesterday -- Pad is helping coach a novice team so while some of his midget Hawk teammates were running drills for the house leaguers, Pad was standing around with a clipboard looking cool and chatting with the adults. Then he got to draft a team. Not sure if he went out for beers and wings with the other coaches afterwards, but I always thought that was required operating procedure.

PS -- the parents stood around watching Leaf coach Paul Maurice lean against a wall and watch his kid run through the drills.

- - -

I watched the Masters all afternoon. It's what I do. I don't watch a lot of golf on TV, but the majors I make time for. Trevor Immelman seems like a good kid, a great golfer and he did some things in a pressure cooker atmosphere where others would have had trouble just breathing.

Tiger played like crap and still finished second.

TV doesn't do justice to either the beauty or the toughness of that golf course, BTW. A buddy of mine played it a few years ago and said TV sort of levels out the hills and the size of the drives the pros hit take the length of the course out of context to average golfers.

For example, number 11. Par 4, 505 yards. Up hill. So assuming you can hit a 285 yard drive uphill (and you -- yes, you -- can't) you still have a 220 yard shot to the green -- with the water to the left. On a par four. And every hole is like that. There's no relief ever. And the greens are so fast that it's like putting on the hood of your car, hoping the ball will stop where the hood ornament is.

Better than average golfers -- 10, 12 handicaps -- would be lucky to break 110 the way the course was set up yesterday.

Like the commercial says, these guys are good.

April 12, 2008

Chris and the Flyers jumped to a quick start Friday afternoon at the Boston Pizza Peewee Challenge, shutting out Erindale 3-0, with Zack R. recording the goose egg in goal.

And while I rarely use this space to boast about my kids, I'm making an exception to that rule to point out that Chris scored two goals and was awarded player of the game honours in a post-game, on-ice ceremony.

Chris spends a lot of time in his older brother's shadow, but not this weekend. It was a huge thrill for the big guy who's never scored a deuce before, let alone been named player of the game. And the cool thing is, he almost had a couple more

The entire team played well -- the defence cleared the puck well and didn't give the other guys many chances, the forwards back checked, the breakout worked.

So it should have been a motivated group of Oakville Flyers on the ice this morning against Applewood, but we just never got going and lost 4-0. Bad coaching I think.

We finish the round-robin play this evening against the Oakville Hound Dogs from our own league, with the winner likely going to the semi-finals tomorrow.

- - -

Speaking of the older brother, four straight nights of two-hour lacrosse tryouts took their toll physically and he was hobbling Thursday night with serious pain in the side of one of his feet, which we feared would make him a doubtful starter for the high school hockey team's three games Friday. He managed to get his skate on and play (surprise!) and the Abbey Park squad beat Robinson (Burlington) and Holy Trinity (Oakville) to get to the final of a tournament for the second time this week, this time vs. Georgetown.

Unfortunately for us, this final was at the same time as Chris's game, so Laura delivered Chris to the Hershey Centre as I was trapped on a stationary GO train trying to get to the same place. I showed up with a minute left in the first period, with the Flyers leading 1-0 on a goal by the Ferginator. Chris, it turns out, missed a good portion of the first period after a tooth came loose and he started gushing blood.

He was patched up when I got there, so Laura bolted back to Oakville for the Abbey Park game, and I started emailing her updates -- "2-0 Flyers -- Chris scores!" and then "3-0 Flyers. Chris Again!!" at which point she replied that she was going to turn around.

She didn't, but probably should have as Georgetown dumped APHS 4-0.

The high school JV season is short but fun, and the Eagles played four tournaments and got the finals twice. That's a pretty good showing. Thanks to all the teachers, staff and students who made it possible.

Here's a team photo. For those of you that know us, Pad has my size and his mother's hair. Back row with the "A" on his jersey. They're actually a good looking group, but they smell really bad after games.

- - -

So right now it's Saturday afternoon and I'm between Chris's games and we're at swimming after our weekly outing to Burger King. Tomorrow may bring more hockey, or it may bring only lacrosse house league evaluations.

One thing for sure it will bring is me watching the Masters on TV and not exerting much energy.

- - -

My playoff predictions are holding up fairly well so far. The only thing that really matters is that Ottawa is down 2-0 to Pittsburgh. My two favourite teams are the Leafs and whoever is playing Ottawa. Go Pens.

April 11, 2008

It's the hap-happiest time of the year.

Masters Weekend.

While I won't actually be prone somewhere for seven hours on each weekend day watching golf, I will be for much of Sunday.

If nothing else, Masters weekend is the sign that you survived another winter, that spring is well and truly here. That hope springs eternal. That Craig Stadler should ease up on the carbs.

Last Masters weekend I was in Halifax -- a big anniversary party for my parents on Saturday, a blinding blizzard, a late and long trip home, and little golf viewing.

This year, Chris and the minor peewee Flyers take to the ice for the last time this season in a weekend tournament that has top priority on all burners in our house, including the opener at 3p today in Mississauga. Getting to a 3p start is going to be a challenge -- what with work, and other pesky things.

Older brother Pad has three more high school hockey games. (He does actually attend classes. Honest.)

I have often contended to Laura that if I was a lottery winner I could pretty much fill every day either looking after or preparing for my kids' various sporting events.

I'd do a lot of charity work, too.

If the Flyers don't make it to the playoff round Sunday, I'll be in front of the TV. It would be sweet to be freezing in a rink on Sunday morning.

Go Flyers.

- - -

The weather sucks. Between the wind and rain, the thing that used to pass itself off as my umbrella is now a tangle of metal and nylon. And I'm wet.

Thanks for asking.

- - -

The lacrosse tryouts finally, mercifully concluded last night. It's a sobering slice of reality when you're kid is old enough to play midget lacrosse -- because he's not the only one getting older.

It can also be exhausting, because we and many others were at the rink until after 11p four nights in a row. Did I mention I'm not as young as I used to be?

Anyway, he made one of the two midget teams and practices start next week (as do rep hockey tryouts) and the change of seasons is almost complete.

Still on that point, house league lacrosse evaluations are this weekend. If you or your kid is a house league player, you should be attending.

Check the schedule, here, to find out when and where to go. Note that the schedule is driven alphabetically.

- - -

So, all in all a quiet restful weekend. Except for the minor peewee hockey tournament for Chris. And the high school hockey tournament. And Chris attending the peewee lacrosse evaluations. And Patrick (who is refereeing lacrosse and coaching a novice team) also attending four hours of evaluations. And Chris having his usual swimming session in the afternoon.

Oh yes. And the Masters.

That guy asleep on the couch Sunday at 4p? That would be me. In theory. And I'm not really sleeping. I'm listening carefully to everything Jim Nantz has to say. Keep talking Jim. I'm listening . . .

Have a great weekend. Go Flyers.

April 10, 2008

Penguins 4 Sens 0.

Except for the eight goals they scored against Toronto, the Sens offence has been missing in action for pretty much two weeks. Good times!

- - -

Frantic day of athletics in our house, and a few other homes around Oakville yesterday. The Abbey Park HS junior team lost to Blakelock in the final of a day-long tournament after good games with Oakville-Trafalgar and Orillia, none of which I saw.

The exhibition lacrosse game last night was less successful as they lost, but with all of their strongest players sitting while the coaches evaluated the rest of the gang, including mine.

Today is relatively light -- 90 minutes of rugby practice and an hour of lacrosse, although the lacrosse practice isn't till 10p. We're starting to feel a bit like lacrosse zombies with the hours of these tryouts, walking around bumping into each other and mumbling John Grant Jr.'s career stats.

- - -

If you live in Oakville, how are you enjoying the new recycling program? What an unmitigated cluster . . . , sorry.

For the benefit of the troops reading overseas, Oakville and the rest of Halton region has embarked on a program to reduce actual garbage by recycling more. Leftovers, egg shells, etc etc. All the gooey wet stuff in your trash is now likely a compostible "thing."

It started this week. Garbage is only collected once every two weeks. Recyclables and compost-crap, weekly. Or so they claim.

So, problem number one is that you can't buy the special bio-degradable bags that line the compost-collector in your kitchen, or the green bin in your garage. It's not a small point.

Second, our recycling was supposed to be collected Tuesday. It was collected at about 6p Wednesday, and a number of streets in our neighbourhood still hadn't been done by the end of yesterday.

Yes, we all want to save the planet because we need a lot of green woodland to drive over in our 4x4s chasing small creatures.

And yes, we understand that change is sometime a little rocky.

But lining the streets of Oakville from 7p Monday night to (so far) 7a Thursday morning with bagged compost and other recyclables is not engendering confidence that things are working.

I have a friend who, whenever he uses the word "recycle" always makes little quotation marks in the air with his fingers, as it to suggest it's all garbage.

He may be right.

I wonder what sort of recycling program the 1.4 billion people in China, and the 1.1 billion people in India are using? I wonder if it works better than what the 150,000 of us in Oakville are annoyed with?

I think it's quite interesting that we folks in western civilization have spent the last 125 year or so polluting the planet with reckless abandon while we built our largely unsustainable by generally very comfortable lifestyles, and now expect the vast majority of the planet to use a different set of rules to get their emerging economies off the ground.

And then our leaders shake their heads when their leaders don't pay attention to them.

Funny old world.

- - -

A great observational moment from my kid Chris, who sometimes talks at (not to, AT) the TV. There was a popcorn commercial on TV, for a brand of popcorn that features "flavours." Tomato. Cheese. Etc.

Chris told the TV that popcorn doesn't need flavouring, it has a flavour. "It's called POPCORN!"

Smart kid.

April 9, 2008

Before I get to the main event, I want to tell you that I went to see my buddy Will the Thrill play last night in what was the last game of the GTHL minor peewee AA final. His team Humber Valley, lost, 3-1 with an empty net goal to Scarborough. They deserved to win.

Not that I'm surprised, but Will played really well -- better than I remember him playing, which is perhaps a lesson to try to get out to see more hockey games. <Pauses here to slap himself.>

Will is a member of the very deep 1996 Oakville hockey cohort and an alumnus of the legendary Timbits's Big Blue Machine.

I didn't get a chance to talk to him after the game, but my only other comment would be that he'd look way better in Ranger blue than Sharks' aqua. And I'll tell him that in person soon.

- - -

There are a lot of midget-age boys limping, groaning and otherwise moving slowly around Oakville this week, and some of the parents are getting less sleep than normal, too. The Oakville Hawks' midget lacrosse tryouts continue apace, and last night's scrimmage was a spirited one, with the boys finally showing some signs that they are competing out there for spots.

So after an afternoon high school hockey practice, and a two-hour lacrosse tryout, my guy was up early for the first of three -- three! -- high school hockey games today in a mini-tournament for the junior teams.

I had an early meeting and was gone before he was up, but usually reliable sources in the kitchen report that he was stiff and sore from head to toe and showing the sprightly movements usually associated with retirement complexes.

Which only goes to show that running and getting hit with a metal stick uses a different set of muscles than skating and getting hit with a carbon-composite stick. Or something.

I take some minor consolation in the fact that other dads are reporting the same creaky movements in their kitchens, and that lots of other guys are in the same high school tournament.

But -- the lacrosse tryouts turn into an exhibition game tonight for some of the midget candidates, Pad among them, so . . . that creaking you hear in the morning will be him after three hockey games and a lacrosse game.

Another two-hour lacrosse tryout Thursday night, rugby practice, and then three more hockey games Friday.

Ah, to be young . . .

- - -

A variety of things -- like, um, work and carting my kid all over creation late at night -- have conspired to delay my NHL playoff predictions. So, without further delay, some fearless prognostications:

EAST

Montreal vs. Boston. The Habs swept the season series 8-0, and there's little to suggest the Bruins have done anything to improve the odds in the playoffs, a couple of key injuries to Montreal notwithstanding. Montreal in five.

Pittsburgh vs. Ottawa. I mean seriously. Are you new here? Do you have to ask? Let's put it this way -- the Sens have lost their captain to injury and the Pens are getting theirs back. And the Pittsburgh captain just happens to be one of the three best players in the game today. Ottawa is talented but flailing. Pens in six.

Rangers vs. New Jersey. I'm going to go out on a limb and call for an upset, Ranger over the Devils. Only an idiot ("Hi, I'm Gerry . . . ) would bet against Brodeur in the playoffs but the I don't think the old axiom about defence winning in the playoffs is going to do the Devils any good if they can't score some goals, because beyond Brodeur, their defence isn't that great. Rangers in seven.

Philadelphia vs. Washington. The Caps have one of the best records in the league over the last 35 games AND they have Ovechkin, who pretty much carried the team into the playoffs. He's going to carry them a little further, and Huet will be playing for a big, fat contract. Caps in six.

WEST

Detroit vs Nashville: Detroit may be the most under-rated President's Cup winner in the history of time. Do they have what it takes to tough it out past Anaheim and San Jose? I don't know, but they're not playing them, they're playing Nashville. Wings in five.

San Jose vs. Calgary. I'd love to see Calgary get on a big roll and go deep into the playoffs. But San Jose basically symbolizes how tough the road out of the West is, and Calgary can't match them line for line. San Jose may be the best team in the league right now. Sharks in six.

Minnesota vs. Colorado. Yawn. Do we care? OK. If I have to pick, I'll pick Minnesota because I think Lemaire is a brilliant coach. Seven games.

Dallas vs. Anaheim. Another really tough series to call, but I'm going with the Ducks. The Ducks are ugly tough on the blue line and if Brad Richards is going to make a big splash in Texas he hasn't done it yet. Ducks in six.

- - -

Yesterday I had CNN on in my office and Wolfe Blitzer was yapping with some talking heads about the upcoming Democratic primary in Pennsylvania. One expert said if Sidney Crosby endorsed Clinton, she's win in a landslide.

Wolfe, who clearly needs to get out more, asked: "Who's Sidney Crosby?"

The pundit said, oh, he's just the most popular athlete in the state right now and can basically do whatever he wants. (That's a big compliment when you consider that ranks him ahead of Ben Roethlisberger, the Steelers' Super Bowl winning quarterback.)

Wolfe said he thought it was a reference to the old Cosby Show.

I changed the channel.

- - -

Pete: Sorry I was late today. And I hope the knee feels better. Try Keiths.

April 8, 2008

So I was sitting in Glen Abbey arena last night at 10:30p breathing in the dust from the sand blasting that had been going on earlier in the day and wondering to myself whether it was a good idea to have 200 or 300 kids cycle through the place for rep lacrosse tryouts, given that the air was filled with what an envionmental consultant would charge you several hundred dollars to call "particulate."

I'm pretty sure the question had two answers -- primarily, no, and secondarily, "what are you, a trouble maker?"

Anyway, other than the floor seeming slippery it didn't seem to bother anyone, and besides that, I like my breathing supply to be high fibre. So, carry on. Breathe deeply and chew.

- - -

The other thing that occurred to me is that I'm not sure how my kid is going to get through this week, let alone me, or his mother. In addition to the two-hour tryouts every night at 9p, tomorrow he has three high school hockey games, and three more hockey games Friday. And I think there's 90-minute rugby practices every day after school on top of that.

Oh, he also attends class from time to time I'm told.

- - -

No, I haven't gotten around to doing NHL playoff predictions. But I will. If you live in Ottawa, you won't like it, either.

- - -

Pad and I got home (after 11p) last night to see the conclusion of the Memphis-Kansas NCAA final. When I turned on the game, Memphis was up by nine. Kansas hit a three pointer with two ticks left to send it to OT, and in OT Memphis should have stayed in the locker room because they were done. It was as stunning a turnabout as you've ever see and I only had to watch about seven minutes of basketball (and two hours of lacrosse tryouts) to get it.

Someone once said there are few things as dramatic and exciting as a really important high school or college basketball game. It's still true.

April 7, 2008

The 2007-08 AA bantam Rangers had their last supper last night, after a day spent slogging through snow and water in a boggy northern paintball location. It was a fun and festive evening, tinged as these things always are with some melancholy as a team disbands and players start preparing mentally for tryouts in only eight days.

As one of the captains said, there were ups and down and smiles and frowns, but on balance it was a good year.

There was a lot of fun and one towering disappointment that everyone spoke of -- the double overtime series-ending loss to Belle River.

It was also without question the highlight of the year.

The bench staff each received a framed and matted full-size version of this poster (below), signed by all the players and created by a very artistic parent. The team photo is from the squad's bronze-medal performance at Lake Placid, framed by shots of each of the players and team staff.

Congratulations to all the Rangers on a fun season and good luck at tryouts. A special personal thanks to the coaching staff for all the commitment that comes with the job, and to the parents who were good-humoured and great company for the last --dare I say it? -- eight months.

- - -

Me, Chris and most of the rest of his minor peewee hockey team had a last practice on Sunday, as we prepare for a season-ending tournament next weekend. Who picks these things on Masters weekend, anyway?

- - -

Speaking of tryouts, rep lacrosse tryouts started yesterday for some age groups and tonight the ugliest and smelliest -- the midgets -- start their workouts at Glen Abbey at 9p. The weather this week is thankfully quite mild, because I have to tell you, there's a special kind of cold that grips an arena in April as you sit and watch the boys wail away on each other.

- - -

The NHL playoff matchups are set. You can read more about that here. I'll do some fearless forecasting in the day day or so. I think these matchups are the toughest to call in recent memory. The NHL salary cap has -- with the notable exception of the Leafs -- led to what may be an era of parity where anyone can win. In the East and West, 12 of 15 teams had winning records. There are some favourites, for sure, but no one looks poised to run the table. The fun starts Wednesday night.

- - -

Hey -- forget the Leafs. forget the Raptors. How about those Jays? A sweep of the World Champion Bosox has them off to a good start. Don't get too excited but, it's not bad.

- - -

A peek at the blog's traffic logs tells me that many of you had better things to do on a sunny April weekend than to sit at your PC. For the first time since Dec 29, traffic on the blog fell below 100 -- barely -- for a day. My dreams of Google stepping in and offering me millions appear to have been premature.

April 5, 2008

The AAA peewee Rangers lost yesterday afternoon in the OHF semi finals, which I'm sure is a disappointment but just to get that far is an amazing feat. Congratulations to all the players and coaches. It was a terrific run.

- - -

Leafs finish their miserable season tonight in Montreal. Good riddance. Maybe it's time we all turned our attention to the Blue Jays, who won their sold-out home opener last night over the Red Sox. Having said that, I can really live without the hideous retro-1977 jerseys. Lord. What were they thinking? Game-over story here.

But before leaving the Leafs today, it's worth noting the page 1 story in the Star about the ticket scandal breaking out at parent company MSLE. One resignation -- which sounds like it may have been an over-reaction but underlines there was at least one guy in the organization with principles -- and some firings, although the nature of the problem isn't precisely spelled out. I'm sure we'll hear more in the days ahead.

Read the story here.

- - -

I'm sitting at White Oaks pool in my usual Saturday afternoon perch, watching Chris swim. For some reason there's only four kids here today which will lessen the overall entertainment value of the session. That's because when the full complement of a dozen or so are here they tend to collide and whatnot.

We prefer full-contact swimming.

- - -

As soon as I leave here, Pad and I are off in search of lacrosse equipment. It won't be a cheap afternoon!

April 4, 2008

Well, that was a stinker. Ottawa 8 Leafs 2.

Honest to God, our minor peewee team could have played a better game. Full credit to Ottawa for actually winning a hockey game they had to win. But I still think they're going nowhere fast.

And when they get there, the Leafs will have taken all the good seats.

If you like to torment yourself as a Leaf fan, you can read more on the debacle here.

- - -

The Vancouver Canucks will miss the playoffs, too. So, Naslund, the Sedin brothers and Sundin can be a Swedish foursome telling jokes about all the Finnish guys and having contests to see who can write the cleverest haiku that uses Ruutu and "you too" the most. Those Swedes are nutty!

- - -

Oh -- still with the Leafs. The cover story in the latest Macleans magazine says, and I quote: "Why The Leafs Stink . . . . What it takes to build a chronic loser."

Really, it's harder than you think.

You can read the story here, or, six or eight months from now when you're at the dentist, rifle through the pile of old magazines and give it a read.

- - -

For the first time in a very long time, I don't expect to be in an arena this weekend. Pad had a high school srimmage this afternoon, but I won't be there. Tomorrow is swimming for Chris. Sunday is the Rangers' team party (paint ball.)

But no time to be spent standing in an arena. I may need a support group.

- - -

Fortunately (I think), the off-season is a short one. Midget rep lacrosse tryouts start Monday night at Glen Abbey, in the coveted 9p to 11p time slot, running for four consecutive nights, (lacrosse tryout schedule is here) to be followed almost immediately by four consecutive nights of rep hockey tryouts for 2008-09. (Rep hockey tryout schedule is here.)

Add to this the remainder of the short high school junior hockey season, plus high school rugby starting up, plus house league lacrosse and evaluations for Chris, and I guess we all have lots to do.

And that's not even accounting for all of the soccer and baseball players around town who I suspect are training/trying out/ etc. too. Those sports never caught on with our kids for some reason.

I guess they're just lazy.

- - -

A loyal correspondent points out that Oakville's Guzzo family are still seeing a lot of hockey arenas these days. Son Steven plays for the junior A Oakville Blades who have just won the western conference title and face Markham for the OPJHL title.

Meanwhile, dad and peewee son Kevin are in Thunder Bay, making a serious run at the OHL AAA peewee crown. They play London in the semi finals today, competing for a spot in Saturday's Ontario championship game.

Wow.

Go Rangers!

Go Blades!

Good luck (and safe travels) to all the Rangers and Blades this weekend.

- - -

April 3, 2008

Note: This entry has been given special exemption from several international treaties, notably those governing the use of run-on sentences and excessive metaphors and similes. Don't try this sort of writing at home. Leave it to professionals.

The Leafs are in Ottawa tonight for some good old-fashioned, pulling-the-wings-off-a-fly hockey. The hapless Senators, choking on all those pre-Christmas headlines chronicling their glory as one of the greatest assemblies of talent to ever walk among other mere NHL mortals are now so spooked by even the lowly Leafs that a team of exorcists from the Vatican should be flown in to induce head-spinning projectile vomiting of the evil hockey spirits as soon as possible.

<Eds note: That's a reference to the 1970s film, The Exorcist.>

The simple fact is the Senators have, with near clockwork precision, lost every single game that really, really mattered in the franchise's recent history. Every one. Most of them to Toronto, too, which is sort of the hockey equivalent of your wife walking out on you every time you're about to celebrate your wedding anniversary and jetting off to Mexico with Marty Feldman (who, incidentally, has been dead since 1982.)

So, it's not a good thing if you're an Ottawa fan. You get it? Good.

The even better fact is that they have never, ever beaten the Leafs in a game that meant anything. Never. Not once.

Ever.

And tonight's game matters -- not to the Leafs whose own ineptness I'm glossing over for now but regular readers will know I've fairly chronicled with morbid fascination -- but for the Senators, who incredibly could miss the playoffs after seemingly standing on the brink of being collectively swept into the Hockey Hall of Fame after only 17 games this year when they sported that nifty 15-2 record and some really bad-ass haircuts.

The Leafs are in the enviable position of being able to toss the flaming spear of despair into the chest of the Senators' collective tonight, and better yet, they get to do it at home.

Now, before I achieve orbit with this rhetorical flight of fancy, it's best to remember that the Leafs' capacity to fail to deliver when needed can't be ignored. They are not very good. Witness back-to-back losses to Boston last week. Pathetic.

The Senators are wounded, but dangerous.

But still. Just do it.

If the Leafs win tonight AND the Senators miss the playoffs, there should be a petition for a parade in Toronto.

If Team Bozo can't deliver us a single Stanley Cup in the last four decades, then celebrating the collapse of Team Smug will do.

- - -

Burlington beat Georgetown 3 games to 1 to win the Tri County bantam AA championship.

April 2, 2008

Almost forgot.

The 2007-08 minor peewee white house league MOHA champs: The Gators. I love the way the kids in the front are staring at the trophy, not at the camera:

April 2, 2008

The Leafs lost in a shootout last night to the Sabres, but that was fine with me because at least Buffalo is playing for something and the Sabres are chasing the dream that they can catch Ottawa for a playoff spot.

Not that I like to dwell on the misery of others, but . . .

Lord, what a turn of events it would be if the Senators should miss the playoffs. And it could happen.

It would be reason for a parade -- in Toronto.

All those who say we should cheer for the Canadian teams? I don't buy it. There are more Canadians on many U.S.-based teams than the Senators have. Location is irrelevant.

In these parts, we just don't care for the Sens.

And last night, at home, they were shutout by the limping Habs and had to listen to large sections of their building cheering for Montreal.

I may soon be one of them.

The dreaded "choke" label is starting to be tossed around in our nation's capital in reference not to what Stephen Harper might like to do to the national press corps, but rather about last season's Eastern Conference representatives in the Stanley Cup final.